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Richard Cheese|Silent Nightclub

Silent Nightclub

Richard Cheese

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Yeah, here's the thing: sometimes it's best to just let a joke die. You know that person who was still saying "not!" at the end of every third sentence in, like, 1994? And how you just wished that person would at the very least just shut up already and, in extreme cases, be slapped repeatedly and in public? That's going to be the general reaction to Richard Cheese's Christmas album, Silent Nightclub. Yes, yes, easy listening versions of alternative rock hits, we know. It's played. Let it go. It's hard to gauge what's more annoying about Silent Nightclub, the mind-numbing banality of the premise or how laughably far Cheese and his cohorts go to find songs that fit the holiday theme. "Personal Jesus"? Sure. "Do They Know It's Christmas"? Naturally. "Like a Virgin"? Reaching. "I Melt with You." -- um -- why, exactly? Actually, to be bluntly honest, the most irritating aspect of the record is how it doesn't go far enough with the premise: why not enliven the songs with some whacked-out Esquivel-style space age bachelor pad arrangements to go with the smarmy nod-and-a-wink vocals? Simply put, there is little reason for this album to exist.

© Stewart Mason /TiVo

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Silent Nightclub

Richard Cheese

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1
Holiday in Cambodia 2006
00:01:38

Richard Cheese, MainArtist - Jello Biafra, Composer - Darren Eric Henley, Composer - East Bay Ray, Composer - Klaus Flouride, Composer - Bruce "Ted" Slesinger, Composer

(C) 2006 Surfdog Records (P) 2006 Surfdog Records

2
Like a Virgin
00:01:25

Richard Cheese, MainArtist - Thomas F. Kelly, Composer - William E. Steinberg, Composer

(C) 2006 Surfdog Records (P) 2006 Surfdog Records

3
Christmas in Las Vegas
00:02:06

Richard Cheese, MainArtist - Mark Jonathan Davis, Composer

(C) 2006 Surfdog Records (P) 2006 Surfdog Records

4
Jingle Bells
00:01:08

Richard Cheese, MainArtist - Traditional, Composer

(C) 2006 Surfdog Records (P) 2006 Surfdog Records

5
Ice Ice Baby
00:02:35

Richard Cheese, MainArtist - Floyd Brown, Composer - Robert van Winkle, Composer - Freddie Mercury, Composer - Roger Taylor, Composer - David Bowie, Composer - Mario Johnson, Composer - John Deacon, Composer - Brian May, Composer

(C) 2006 Surfdog Records (P) 2006 Surfdog Records

6
Do They Know It's Christmas
00:01:26

Richard Cheese, MainArtist - James Ure, Composer - Robert Geldof, Composer

(C) 2006 Surfdog Records (P) 2006 Surfdog Records

7
Personal Jesus 2006
00:02:10

Richard Cheese, MainArtist - Martin Lee Gore, Composer

(C) 2006 Surfdog Records (P) 2006 Surfdog Records

8
Imagine
00:01:45

Richard Cheese, MainArtist - John Lennon, Composer

(C) 2006 Surfdog Records (P) 2006 Surfdog Records

9
Last Xmas
00:00:18

Richard Cheese, MainArtist - GEORGE MICHAEL, Composer

(C) 2006 Surfdog Records (P) 2006 Surfdog Records

10
Naughty Girl
00:01:49

Beyoncé Knowles, Composer - Robert Waller, Composer - Angela Beyince, Composer - Pete Bellotte, Composer - Richard Cheese, MainArtist - Giorgio Moroder, Composer - Scott Storch, Composer - Donna Summer, Composer

(C) 2006 Surfdog Records (P) 2006 Surfdog Records

11
Christmastime Is Here
00:01:28

Richard Cheese, MainArtist - Vince Guaraldi, Composer - Lee Maurice Mendelson, Composer

(C) 2006 Surfdog Records (P) 2006 Surfdog Records

12
The Trees
00:02:31

Alex Lifeson, Composer - Geddy Lee, Composer - Richard Cheese, MainArtist - Neal Peart, Composer

(C) 2006 Surfdog Records (P) 2006 Surfdog Records

13
I Melt with You
00:02:47

Richard Cheese, MainArtist - Michael Conroy, Composer - Gary McDowell, Composer - Stephen Walker, Composer - Robbie Grey, Composer - Richard Brown, Composer

(C) 2006 Surfdog Records (P) 2006 Surfdog Records

14
Silent Night
00:01:31

Richard Cheese, MainArtist - Traditional, Composer

(C) 2006 Surfdog Records (P) 2006 Surfdog Records

15
Holidae Inn Explicit
00:02:03

Christopher Brian Bridges, Composer - Richard Cheese, MainArtist - Shamar Daugherty, Composer - Howard Earl Baily, Composer - Alonzo Jr. Lee, Composer

(C) 2006 Surfdog Records (P) 2006 Surfdog Records

Album review

Yeah, here's the thing: sometimes it's best to just let a joke die. You know that person who was still saying "not!" at the end of every third sentence in, like, 1994? And how you just wished that person would at the very least just shut up already and, in extreme cases, be slapped repeatedly and in public? That's going to be the general reaction to Richard Cheese's Christmas album, Silent Nightclub. Yes, yes, easy listening versions of alternative rock hits, we know. It's played. Let it go. It's hard to gauge what's more annoying about Silent Nightclub, the mind-numbing banality of the premise or how laughably far Cheese and his cohorts go to find songs that fit the holiday theme. "Personal Jesus"? Sure. "Do They Know It's Christmas"? Naturally. "Like a Virgin"? Reaching. "I Melt with You." -- um -- why, exactly? Actually, to be bluntly honest, the most irritating aspect of the record is how it doesn't go far enough with the premise: why not enliven the songs with some whacked-out Esquivel-style space age bachelor pad arrangements to go with the smarmy nod-and-a-wink vocals? Simply put, there is little reason for this album to exist.

© Stewart Mason /TiVo

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